Bring Romance To Your Valentine’s Day

“The word ‘romance,’ according to the dictionary, means excitement, adventure, and something extremely real. Romance should last a lifetime.” ~Billy GrahamBring Romance To Your Valentine’s Day

1.      Plan ahead:  Don’t buy gifts or flowers at the last minute; make dinner reservations now, long lines are aggravating and tend to kill the mood you’re trying to create.  It also makes the evening feel more special when you can walk right in and go to your table.

2.      Always get a card, better yet, make one yourself.  If you buy a card, get a blank one and write your own sentiments inside, instead of someone else’s words.

3.      If you can, take the day off from work.  Go on a picnic.  Romantic spots can be found in your yard or you could travel to somewhere within a couple of hours away.  The time together in the car can be very connecting provided you don’t act like a road raging idiot when you drive.

4.      Go to church and say a special prayer for your relationship.  If you are not a member of a church you can borrow one.  A variation may be a nice place that is within town such a fountain or a park.

5.      Write a love letter or a poem.  I know this stuff is awkward for some of you but believe me; this will have lasting positive impact.  I have heard many stories in couple’s therapy in which the wife gave the husband a lot of extra chances because she knew that he had once been romantic.

6.      Recreate your first date, proposal, or another special moment.

7.      Unplug the television and/or the computer for the day.  Take the day off from Facebook and Twitter.  Put the focus on your partner and each other.

8.      Carve each of your initials in a tree.  This is a timeless classic.

9.      Tell your partner that you love them and when you tell them, say it with enthusiasm, and from your heart.

          I believe that every man and woman can be the most romantic person in the world.  Being a romantic should be a part of your everyday behavior.   Give the one you love your complete attention and make sure you convey the message that they are special to you.

10.    Either take her out to dinner or cook her dinner.  Give her the night off from the kitchen.  Or ladies, if you typically don’t cook then go all out and cook his favorite meal.

11.    Instead of dinner by candlelight, serve breakfast by candlelight.  The point of some of these ideas is that you are trying to distinguish the day as special as opposed to just another day.

12.    Make a list of the 10 reasons why you fell in love with them.  Better yet; make a list of 20 reasons why you love him or her even more today.  I regularly talk with clients who can tell you all the great things about their partner after the relationship or marriage has ended and they wish they would have said those things when they had the chance.

13.    Always wrap your gifts.  Use extra nice wrapping paper and fancy bows.  Remember, you’re trying to make them feel special.

14.    Go for a walk and hold hands.  Don’t be one of those people who won’t hold hands in public.

15.    Sing your Valentine a love song even if you aren’t a good singer.  My wife once sang me Celine Dion’s, “Because You Loved Me”.  She looked me straight in the eyes and sang her heart out.  She doesn’t think she sings well but she sounded like an Angel to me.

16.    Spend the day watching romantic movies.  (Guys if you do this one; don’t fall asleep or whine about it).

17.    Reserve a night in a hotel’s honeymoon suite.

18.    If you plan to buy her clothing, make sure you know all her sizes.

19.   Arrange for a babysitter.  Most men consider this to be the woman’s responsibility but women love it when the man takes the initiative.  This strategy alone will blow her doors off.  Ask family or friends to watch your children.

20.  Look through your wedding album together.  Do you remember how handsome he was or how beautiful she was on your wedding day?  Then tell them and while you’re at it, reminisce about that day and how close you felt.  Recommit yourself to your partner in some way: promise you will strive to live up to your wedding vows; to have more fun in the relationship; or to be more spiritually focused as a partner.

I encourage you to go for impact.  You want to bring a smile to his face or a tear to her eye.  Do something so out of the ordinary that you surprise even yourself.  As a marriage therapist, I hear so many stories of regret.  Look for a way to create a new beginning for your relationship and then strive to do it again tomorrow.  This life is not a dress rehearsal and tomorrow isn’t promised to anyone.  The moments pass much too quickly.  Seize this day, every day and let your partner know how special they are to you.

Mark Webb is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist in private practice at South Georgia Psychiatric and Counseling Center in Valdosta. Mark Webb is also the author of How To Be a Great Partner and founder of Partner Focused Relationships™.   Sign up for Mark Webb’s “Relationship Strategies”  Ezine ($100 Value).  Mark Webb is the Relationship Specialist, his relationship advice and marital advice has helped many thru the years, let him guide you to a stronger healthier relationship.

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